i didn't wanna write this holding a rope on the throat of my emotions till it tightens like this, close your eyes & imagine, vice grips either way, i'd have never turned on this light switch revealing grief & hate, exposing my iris yet here i am today, staring at my face, sharing your likeness since you left, my life has been silent except when i'm writing from a soul that's been hiding, & crying like sirens, imploding inside, with a, plethora of enlightenment foreign to how i've been stereotyped & what i've noticed, about my masculine moments i'm never excited, or asking, i'm telling through poems that collapses your shoulders relaxing you like passion do, when it's all over fully aware when you're there your spirit makes an appearance like when i'm in the mirror about to break it, cause i can't take; missing my parent it's been 25 years, since you been here, still your voice i still hear it crystal clear; i miss you i swear i kiss your picture so much that i smear it the last time i touched your hand it was cold grandma said God had your soul the nerve of Him, i'm only 6, i barely even heard of Him begging Him to give you back for as long as i've known nah mom, i'm still not okay, i'm alone missing you everyday until i get Home...